{"id":784,"date":"2017-06-20T17:15:30","date_gmt":"2017-06-20T15:15:30","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.dejmezenamsanci.cz\/?p=784"},"modified":"2017-08-18T11:28:02","modified_gmt":"2017-08-18T09:28:02","slug":"o-nasili-nestaci-vedet-je-potreba-o-nem-umet-mluvit","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.dejmezenamsanci.cz\/en\/o-nasili-nestaci-vedet-je-potreba-o-nem-umet-mluvit\/","title":{"rendered":"O n\u00e1sil\u00ed nesta\u010d\u00ed v\u011bd\u011bt, je pot\u0159eba o n\u011bm um\u011bt mluvit"},"content":{"rendered":"

Sorry, this entry is only available in CZ<\/a>.<\/p>

Nadace OSF zorganizovala v r\u00e1mci bilater\u00e1ln\u00edho fondu dal\u0161\u00ed \u00fa\u017easnou cestu do Norska. Ve spolupr\u00e1ci s norskou organizac\u00ed Alternativa n\u00e1sil\u00ed a \u00fa\u0159adem norsk\u00e9 ombudsmanky vyslala dvac\u00edtku odborn\u00edk\u016f na \u0161kolen\u00ed \u0161kolitel\u016f k filmu Zu\u0159ivec a p\u0159ipravila prezentace norsk\u00fdch akt\u00e9r\u016f s p\u016fsobnost\u00ed v oblasti dom\u00e1c\u00edho n\u00e1sil\u00ed. A na tom, \u017ee jim \u0161kolen\u00ed p\u0159ineslo mnoho nov\u00fdch poznatk\u016f a zku\u0161enost\u00ed, se nakonec podle hodnocen\u00ed shodli v\u0161ichni.<\/em><\/p>\n

Norsko ve mn\u011b v\u017edycky vyvol\u00e1valo p\u0159edstavu studen\u00e9, syrov\u00e9 krajiny, kde se od jednoho \u010dlov\u011bka k druh\u00e9mu t\u00e1hnou kilometry ne \u00fapln\u011b vl\u00eddn\u00e9 p\u0159\u00edrody. Prvn\u00ed p\u0159ekvapen\u00ed p\u0159ed cestou do Osla jsem za\u017eila u\u017e p\u0159i pohledu na p\u0159edpov\u011b\u010f po\u010das\u00ed na nejlep\u0161\u00edm norsk\u00e9m serveru \u2013 25 \u00b0C, slune\u010dno, bezv\u011bt\u0159\u00ed. A opravdov\u00fd \u0161ok p\u0159i\u0161el, kdy\u017e jsem v p\u016flnoci v \u00fater\u00fd 13. z\u00e1\u0159\u00ed vystoupila na Sentralstasjon \u2013 zd\u00e1nliv\u011b jsem se toti\u017e ocitla uprost\u0159ed l\u00e9ta v It\u00e1lii. Ulice pln\u00e9 lid\u00ed, m\u011bstem se linula hudba a sm\u00edch. A tahle n\u00e1lada v n\u011bm vydr\u017eela a\u017e do m\u00e9ho p\u00e1te\u010dn\u00edho odjezdu \u2013 podle norsk\u00fdch m\u00e9di\u00ed nebylo takov\u00e9 po\u010das\u00ed v Oslu v\u00edc jak sto let.<\/p>\n

S p\u0159\u00edjemnou letn\u00ed atmosf\u00e9rou v\u0161ak prudce kontrastovalo v\u0161e, co jsme spolu s dvac\u00edtkou \u010desk\u00fdch odborn\u00edk\u016f z neziskov\u00fdch organizac\u00ed, interven\u010dn\u00edch center, st\u00e1tn\u00edch instituc\u00ed a nemocnic sly\u0161eli b\u011bhem dvoudenn\u00edho \u0161kolen\u00ed k filmu Zu\u0159ivec, a prezentace norsk\u00fdch organizac\u00ed pracuj\u00edc\u00edch s dom\u00e1c\u00edm n\u00e1sil\u00edm. Ale p\u011bkn\u011b popo\u0159\u00e1dku!<\/p>\n

St\u0159edu jsme str\u00e1vili s Barborou Jakobsen a Mariusem R\u00e5kilem z organizace Alternativ til Vold \u2013 Alternativa n\u00e1sil\u00ed, zkr\u00e1cen\u011b ATV. Marius velmi zap\u00e1len\u011b mluvil o tom, jak ATV vznikla a jak se postupn\u011b vyv\u00edjela od mal\u00e9 organizace o \u010dty\u0159ech lidech ke dne\u0161n\u00ed podob\u011b ATV jako rozs\u00e1hl\u00e9 s\u00edti center s \u0161edes\u00e1ti zku\u0161en\u00fdmi psychology, kter\u00e1 z\u00e1rove\u0148 funguje jako v\u00fdzkumn\u00e9 a vzd\u011bl\u00e1vac\u00ed st\u0159edisko. Mnoho \u010desk\u00fdch koleg\u016f se zaj\u00edmalo o to, jak ATV z\u00edskala prvn\u00ed klienty, proto\u017ee s t\u00edmhle probl\u00e9mem sami bojuj\u00ed. Jak p\u0159iv\u00e9st osoby p\u00e1chaj\u00edc\u00ed n\u00e1sil\u00ed v bl\u00edzk\u00fdch vztaz\u00edch k terapii? V \u010cesk\u00e9 republice p\u0159ich\u00e1zej\u00ed nej\u010dast\u011bji proto, \u017ee jim terapii na\u0159\u00edd\u00ed soud, jejich motivace je v\u0161ak v\u011bt\u0161inou miziv\u00e1. ATV zvolila neobvyklou cestu \u2013 zaplatila si inzer\u00e1t v novin\u00e1ch. Bijete svoji \u017eenu? M\u016f\u017eete n\u00e1m zavolat. A na jin\u00e9m m\u00edst\u011b stejn\u00fdch novin byl oti\u0161t\u011bn\u00fd \u010dl\u00e1nek o tom, \u017ee n\u00e1sil\u00ed v bl\u00edzk\u00fdch vztaz\u00edch je b\u011b\u017en\u00e9 a \u017ee se s n\u00edm d\u00e1 n\u011bco d\u011blat. Hned druh\u00fd den zavolalo na telefonn\u00ed \u010d\u00edslo z inzer\u00e1tu \u0161edes\u00e1t mu\u017e\u016f a od t\u00e9 doby kapacita ATV zdaleka nesta\u010d\u00ed popt\u00e1vce.<\/p>\n

V \u010dem podle Mariuse spo\u010d\u00edv\u00e1 \u00fasp\u011bch ATV? Od za\u010d\u00e1tku d\u00e1v\u00e1 n\u00e1siln\u00edk\u016fm najevo, \u017ee jejich chov\u00e1n\u00ed nebagatelizuje, neodsuzuje je za n\u011bj, jedn\u00e1 s nimi s respektem. Z\u00e1rove\u0148 v\u0161ak sv\u00e9 klienty striktn\u011b vede k p\u0159ijet\u00ed odpov\u011bdnosti za n\u00e1sil\u00ed \u2013 proto\u017ee za n\u00e1sil\u00ed nese v\u017edy vinu ten, kdo ho p\u00e1ch\u00e1. T\u00edmto p\u0159\u00edstupem sehr\u00e1la ATV z\u00e1sadn\u00ed roli ve spole\u010densk\u00e9 debat\u011b a p\u0159isp\u011bla ke zm\u011bn\u011b v pohledu norsk\u00e9 spole\u010dnosti na n\u00e1sil\u00ed.<\/p>\n

Jako \u010dlov\u011bka pono\u0159en\u00e9ho v komunikaci m\u011b v\u0161ak nejv\u00edce oslovilo, kdy\u017e Marius i Barbora otev\u0159eli ot\u00e1zku tematizace n\u00e1sil\u00ed. Mnoho klient\u016f ATV uv\u00e1d\u00ed, \u017ee by v\u016fbec nebyli schopni o n\u00e1sil\u00ed mluvit, kdyby jim terapeuti u\u017e p\u0159i prvn\u00edm sezen\u00ed nepolo\u017eili velmi konkr\u00e9tn\u00ed dotazy. N\u00e1siln\u00edci sami sebe jako n\u00e1siln\u00edky \u010dasto nenahl\u00ed\u017eej\u00ed, proto je nutn\u00e9 nejprve n\u00e1sil\u00ed definovat a um\u011bt se na n\u011bj zeptat.
\nTot\u00e9\u017e pak plat\u00ed o p\u0159\u00edb\u011bhu, kter\u00fd vedl k nato\u010den\u00ed animovan\u00e9ho filmu Zu\u0159ivec, zalo\u017een\u00e9m na skute\u010dn\u00e9m p\u0159\u00edb\u011bhu. Terapeut \u00d8ivind Aschjem pracoval se skupinou d\u011bt\u00ed vystaven\u00fdch dom\u00e1c\u00edmu n\u00e1sil\u00ed, \u0159e\u0161ily zejm\u00e9na ot\u00e1zku viny. Jedna z d\u00edvek se zeptala, kolik lid\u00ed o n\u00e1sil\u00ed v rodin\u00e1ch v\u00ed. \u00d8ivind odpov\u011bd\u011bl, \u017ee hodn\u011b, ale ne dost. D\u00edvka se zeptala, zda o n\u00e1sil\u00ed v\u00ed kr\u00e1l. Spole\u010dn\u011b pak napsali kr\u00e1li dopis, ten je p\u0159ijal na sv\u00e9m z\u00e1mku. B\u011bhem audience jim \u0159ekl jednu mimo\u0159\u00e1dn\u011b d\u016fle\u017eitou v\u011btu: Nen\u00ed to va\u0161e vina. P\u0159\u00edb\u011bh m\u00e1 tedy dv\u011b poselstv\u00ed \u2013 za n\u00e1sil\u00ed nenesou vinu d\u011bti a nez\u016fst\u00e1vej se sv\u00fdm tajemstv\u00edm s\u00e1m, \u0159ekni to n\u011bkomu. Teprve kdy\u017e se o n\u00e1sil\u00ed v\u00ed, je mo\u017en\u00e9 ho zastavit.<\/p>\n

Stejn\u00fd vzkaz p\u0159edali \u00fa\u010dastn\u00edk\u016fm \u0161kolen\u00ed tak\u00e9 Erik a Stein, terapeuti, kte\u0159\u00ed s filmem Zu\u0159ivec objeli devades\u00e1t p\u011bt \u0161kol v Norsku a pracovali s jeden\u00e1cti tis\u00edci d\u011bt\u00ed. D\u011bti podle nich mnohdy nev\u00ed, \u017ee to, co za\u017e\u00edvaj\u00ed, je n\u00e1sil\u00ed. Teprve kdy\u017e jim terapeuti polo\u017eili spr\u00e1vn\u00e9 ot\u00e1zky, dozv\u011bd\u011bli se v\u00edc. Trefn\u00fd je v t\u00e9to souvislosti cit\u00e1t jedn\u00e9 13tilet\u00e9 d\u00edvky: \u201eJestli to, o \u010dem mluv\u00edte, je n\u00e1sil\u00ed, tak n\u00e1\u0161 u\u010ditel ho na n\u00e1s p\u00e1ch\u00e1 hodn\u011b.\u201c Z\u00e1rove\u0148 v\u0161ak upozor\u0148ovali na skute\u010dnost, \u017ee d\u011bti n\u011bkdy vys\u00edlaj\u00ed jak\u00e9si k\u00f3dovan\u00e9 sign\u00e1ly, nesm\u00edme v\u017edy br\u00e1t jejich slova p\u0159esn\u011b tak, jak je \u0159\u00edkaj\u00ed, ale hledat, co je za nimi. Erik se Steinem n\u00e1m tak\u00e9 sv\u011b\u0159ili, \u017ee pomoc\u00ed filmu se poda\u0159ilo odkr\u00fdt takovou spoustu n\u00e1sil\u00ed v rodin\u00e1ch, \u017ee pomocn\u00e9 profese pak v\u016fbec nezvl\u00e1daly p\u0159\u00edval klient\u016f.<\/p>\n

P\u00e1tek jsme str\u00e1vili v kancel\u00e1\u0159i norsk\u00e9 ombudsmanky a sezn\u00e1mili se s probl\u00e9mem n\u00e1sil\u00ed v bl\u00edzk\u00fdch vztaz\u00edch v Norsku z mnoha \u00fahl\u016f pohledu. Svou pr\u00e1ci n\u00e1m prezentovala porodn\u00ed asistentka, i ona mluvila o tom, jak je d\u016fle\u017eit\u00e9 se na n\u00e1sil\u00ed um\u011bt zeptat a mluvit o n\u011bm. Bez toho by se j\u00ed z\u0159ejm\u011b \u017e\u00e1dn\u00e1 t\u011bhotn\u00e1 \u017eena nesv\u011b\u0159ila. Zm\u00ednila tak\u00e9 fakt vypl\u00fdvaj\u00edc\u00ed z psychologick\u00fdch v\u00fdzkum\u016f, \u017ee na n\u00e1sil\u00ed jsou citliv\u00e9 u\u017e d\u011bti p\u0159ed narozen\u00edm, i pro\u017eitek n\u00e1sil\u00ed v prenat\u00e1ln\u00edm stavu ovliv\u0148uje jejich modely chov\u00e1n\u00ed a psychick\u00e9 nastaven\u00ed v budouc\u00edm \u017eivot\u011b. Zam\u011bstnankyn\u011b ministerstva spravedlnosti a ve\u0159ejn\u00e9 bezpe\u010dnosti n\u00e1m p\u0159edstavily ak\u010dn\u00ed pl\u00e1n na zvl\u00e1d\u00e1n\u00ed n\u00e1sil\u00ed v bl\u00edzk\u00fdch vztaz\u00edch, sly\u0161eli jsme o pr\u00e1ci organizace Reform, kter\u00e1 se v\u011bnuje hlavn\u011b mlad\u00fdm mu\u017e\u016fm. Vid\u011bli jsme kr\u00e1tk\u00e9 filmy o \u017eivot\u011b v azylov\u00fdch domech.<\/p>\n

Sly\u0161eli jsme mnoho v\u011bc\u00ed, kter\u00e9 by \u010dlov\u011bk rad\u011bji nesly\u0161el. Mluvili jsme o n\u00e1sil\u00ed, i kdy\u017e mnohem jednodu\u0161\u0161\u00ed by bylo o n\u011bm nemluvit. Jen\u017ee n\u00e1sil\u00ed nezmiz\u00ed t\u00edm, \u017ee se o n\u011bm nebudeme bavit. Nesta\u010d\u00ed o n\u011bm v\u011bd\u011bt, je pot\u0159eba o n\u011bm v\u00e9st spole\u010denskou debatu a um\u011bt se pt\u00e1t t\u011bch, kdo s n\u00edm maj\u00ed probl\u00e9m.
\nA nad t\u00edm v\u0161\u00edm sv\u00edtilo slunce jako na jihu bezstarostn\u00e9 It\u00e1lie.<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Sorry, this entry is only available in CZ.Nadace OSF zorganizovala v r\u00e1mci bilater\u00e1ln\u00edho fondu dal\u0161\u00ed \u00fa\u017easnou cestu do Norska. Ve spolupr\u00e1ci s norskou organizac\u00ed Alternativa n\u00e1sil\u00ed a \u00fa\u0159adem norsk\u00e9 ombudsmanky vyslala dvac\u00edtku odborn\u00edk\u016f na \u0161kolen\u00ed \u0161kolitel\u016f k filmu Zu\u0159ivec a p\u0159ipravila prezentace norsk\u00fdch akt\u00e9r\u016f s p\u016fsobnost\u00ed v oblasti dom\u00e1c\u00edho n\u00e1sil\u00ed. A na tom, \u017ee jim […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":1297,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-784","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-nezarazene"],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.dejmezenamsanci.cz\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/784","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.dejmezenamsanci.cz\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.dejmezenamsanci.cz\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.dejmezenamsanci.cz\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.dejmezenamsanci.cz\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=784"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.dejmezenamsanci.cz\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/784\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":786,"href":"https:\/\/www.dejmezenamsanci.cz\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/784\/revisions\/786"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.dejmezenamsanci.cz\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/1297"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.dejmezenamsanci.cz\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=784"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.dejmezenamsanci.cz\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=784"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.dejmezenamsanci.cz\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=784"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}